How to Deal with Conflict at Work
Effective strategies and skills you can start developing to deal with difficult situations at your company.
Dealing with difficult conversations or conflict at work is something very challenging and hard to do. Sometimes, avoiding these situations seems like the best way to get rid of them. But believe me, most of the times it will just make things worst, and unfortunately the problem will not only persist yet it could become bigger.
That’s why learning how to deal with conflicts it’s an essential skill for personal and professional growth. Specially, if you are considering the managerial path for your career plans.
Conflict can cost significantly to your company
Workplace conflict can have significant consequences for a company, including negative impacts on company culture and the bottom line. A study estimated that workplace conflict costs US companies $359 billion per year, based on employees spending an average of 2.8 hours per week dealing with conflict.
Estimating the cost of these consequences is challenging, but replacing employees can be expensive, ranging from 50% of an entry-level employee's salary to over 200% of a senior executive's salary.
The ultimate cost of workplace conflict is difficult to fully quantify but considering factors like lost employee time, turnover, and absenteeism provides some insight into the potential impacts. Also, workplace conflict can also interfere with work projects and impact employee motivation and morale.
Strategies to help you navigate conflict more effectively
Let’s keep in mind, conflicts are a natural part of human interactions and that the goal is not to "win" but to find resolutions that preserve relationships and foster a positive environment. Yet there are some strategies that you can implement to do this more effectively:
Stay calm and composed
This is very difficult! it’s essential to remain calm and composed during difficult conversations. Take a few deep breaths before responding and avoid letting emotions escalate the situation.
Choose the right time and place
Pick an appropriate time and a private, neutral location to discuss sensitive issues. Avoid discussing such matters in front of others, as it could make the situation to escalate.
Listen more, talk less
Listen attentively to the other person's perspective without interrupting. Show empathy and understanding, even if you disagree with their viewpoint. Sometimes, just allowing them to express themselves can alleviate some tension.
Focus on the issue, not the person
Avoid personal attacks or blaming individuals. Keep the focus on the problem at hand and how you can resolve it together.
Use "I" statements
When expressing your concerns, use "I" statements instead of "you" statements. This approach helps you take ownership of your feelings and prevents the other person from feeling attacked. For example, say, "I felt disappointed when the project wasn't completed on time" instead of "You are always late with your work."
Seek common ground
Look for areas of agreement or shared goals, as they can provide a foundation for finding a resolution.
Be solution-oriented
Instead of dwelling on the problem, concentrate on finding solutions. Collaboratively brainstorm ideas and discuss potential compromises.
Avoid making assumptions
Don't assume you know the other person's intentions or motivations. Ask clarifying questions to gain a better understanding of their perspective.
Use positive language
Frame your points in a positive and constructive manner. Avoid negative language that could provoke defensiveness.
Know when to take a break
If the conversation becomes too heated or unproductive, suggest taking a short break to cool off before returning to the discussion.
Involve a mediator if necessary
If you're unable to find common ground, consider involving a neutral third party, like a supervisor or HR representative, to mediate the conversation.
Follow up
After the conversation, follow up with the other person to ensure that progress is being made toward resolving the conflict. Show appreciation for their willingness to work towards a solution.
Learn from the experience
Reflect on the conversation and identify any areas where you could have handled things better. Use these insights to improve your communication skills for future conflicts.
Skills to help you handle difficult situations
Conflict resolution skills are the abilities and techniques used to address and resolve conflicts or disagreements effectively and constructively. These skills are essential in various aspects of life, including personal relationships, work settings, and community interactions.
They encompass a range of behaviors and approaches that promote understanding, cooperation, and compromise. Let’s take a look:
Active Listening: The ability to listen attentively to the other person's perspective without interrupting or becoming defensive. Active listening demonstrates empathy and shows that you value the other person's viewpoint.
Empathy: Understanding and acknowledging the emotions and feelings of others involved in the conflict. Empathy helps create a supportive and non-judgmental atmosphere, facilitating communication and problem-solving.
Effective Communication: Expressing your own thoughts, feelings, and concerns clearly and respectfully. Good communication helps prevent misunderstandings and allows both parties to share their perspectives openly.
Problem-Solving: Collaboratively working with the other person to find mutually beneficial solutions. This involves identifying the root causes of the conflict and exploring various options for resolution.
Assertiveness: Standing up for your needs and interests without being aggressive or dismissive of others' viewpoints. Being assertive helps you communicate your boundaries and expectations effectively.
Flexibility: Being open to considering alternative perspectives and solutions. Flexibility allows for creative problem-solving and finding common ground.
Conflict De-escalation: Recognizing signs of escalating conflict and using strategies to defuse tensions before they intensify.
Mediation and Negotiation: Being skilled in facilitating discussions between conflicting parties and helping them reach mutually agreeable resolutions.
Wrapping Up
Remember, conflict is a natural part of working in any organization, and how you handle it can significantly impact your relationships and overall job satisfaction. By approaching difficult conversations with empathy, open-mindedness, and a focus on resolution, you can create a more positive and productive work environment.
I really recommend the book "Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity" by Kim Scott. This book provides valuable insights and practical advice on how to implement the Radical Candor approach in the workplace, emphasizing the importance of caring personally while challenging directly. It's a great resource for leaders, managers, and anyone looking to improve their communication skills and foster a more positive and productive work environment.
How do you deal with conflict in your team and company? Le me know in the comments!
Definitely wish I had more of these skills when I was early in my career. Many of days spent hiding away angrily eating sandwiches at my desk because I couldn't just work it out. Great tips.
Great insights, keep calm 👌